Oh dear, oh dear! My stats tell me that I've betrayed 29 people yesterday and 25 today: not very impressive, is it? But, my dear global Followers, I wasn't able to write for you last night for a very good reason. We were dining with our former employers.

Ah yes. I thought that would do the trick. And I can tell you, because I know you're longing to know, that they are very well indeed, and very much enjoying their new life. I won't give away too much detail on this open blog, not because there's anything controversial or contentious that might land me in trouble, but simply because chat over the dinner table is not really for public consumption, as I'm sure you'll all agree. Suffice it to say that we enjoyed a really lovely evening, and that all is well.

As for things in Newtonian land, as one of you referred to our empire today, all's well here. too. Tonight was black shoe-cleaning night, and you'd be amazed just how seriously our rezzies take such things! Actually, you probably wouldn't, because you'll be fully aware of the competitive spirit of your offspring. The effort that went into it all, though, was tremendous, and there were no less than six lucky winners!

Such was the conscientiousness of the troops, that I was inveigled into turning on the hi-fi radio, which, as you know from previous posts, is possessed of two mighty speakers, and once again, being the recidivistic males that we are, we endeavoured to pump up the volume very, very gradually, to see how much we could get away with, while the inmates did their best to emulate the candidates on 'Strictly'. Oh yes, there are plenty of embryonic Widdies here. (Oh yes, very funny. I can do telepathy, you know.)

So there we are. I hope tonight's offering has managed to fill the giant chasm in your lives, that aching void, that gaping crevasse in the existence of humanity - no, I mustn't get carried away.

Oh, and in case you're wondering, we got away with just above 'very', but some way below 'deafening'. (And way below 'normal'.)

Bonne nuit.