It's the night of The Ball, and for anyone who's still at home, I'm in my glad-rags, and have just strolled housemagisterially among my subjects. I give you, therefore, the following:

Dr Dean: Oh I say! Almost a rhombus!

H.E.: Oh sir! You look just like James Bond - only better!

O.B.: Come on then sir: show us your moves!

And that's before Mrs C and I have even stepped out of the lodge!