A good report from Dr Dean about last night, despite his having drawn the shortest of straws in that it was he who found himself on duty here the night that exams finished! Still, hecan cope: he can simply bamboozle the residents with existentialism if they start getting uppity.

It was another 'everything' morning this morning - and I wish you'd been here. I am now more convinced than ever that the working of the male and female mind is totally different, and my research is based on the fact that when I announced to each dormitory that 'it's everything this morning', at least one representative from each place enquired whether that included certain items that, apparently, did not constitute what they or I might imagine to be 'everything'. Thus, when enquiring of the Ubergrupenfuhrerein whether towels and flannels were included, the only possible answer was, apparently, 'Don't be ridiculous. Of course they're not. 'Everything' means 'linen'. Can't you work that out?' Er, no. And I bet Dr Dean couldn't, either, even with a Ph D in Renaissance lit.

Behold four males, then, lodgemeister included, standing around the usual array of three baskets, looking confused and helpless.

"Um, sir, do these go in there? Or in there?"

"Yes. Actually, no."

"Do sheets go in here, sir, or, or ....... "

In the end I admitted defeat. I called for Miss Ruthie, who was waking tardy inmates, who arrived without hesitation and solved all 'issues' immediately.

Existentialism is much easier to understand.