Glowsticks - or however you spell it! I tell you, if I see another one of those wretched things I'll, I'll, I'll wrap it around its owner's neck! (Which is, in fact, just one way in which Newtonians chose to sport their bonfire nightwear, so it would be nothing new. Some chose to wear them as halos, which, in certain cases, was somewhat unexpected.) Still, I mustn't go on about them, especially as I promised my assistant lodgemaster that I would make no blog refererence to the one that spolit open the other night (of its own volition, I am given to understand by its former owner) and released its contents onto the carpet, resulting in a mass clear-up operation before the Newtonian Fuhrer arrived home.

Enough of last night's festivities, and I will make no reference at all to sticky toffee apples and the dispensing thereof, because I don't want to get bogged down in all that. All I can say is that I am extremely thankful that it rained heavily just after the display, and the excitement of watching a fire burn. (Dear me, I sound more like Victor Meldrew every day, don't I?)

I must share an e-mail dialogue or two with you, as they came as replies from my 'all student' round robin to the school, asking if anyone had a teddy cat that I could borrow for the play. The answers were priceless, especially the following three:

no sorry sir i dont. i have a cool monkey though

sorry i don't, BUUUUT I do have an ENORMUUOUS BUNNY

no sorry sir, but i could get my mum to buy one

I can't wait to log back on to my e-mail system and see what today's cyberspatial postbag brings!

Another pleasing comment came from a Newtonian just now, as he watched me write a comment in another boy's English exercise book. I started by writing the word 'Good'.

"Oh sir, your Gs are SO cool!"

So there you are. Oh, there was one other comment, following my observation to a non-Newtonian that he displayed too many of the characteristics that I displayed at school, i.e.: handing in work that was probably just about good enough, reasonable enough, because he knows that he can get away with it.

"See how you'll turn out," said I. "And I know what you're thinking, too. You don't want to end up as a fat 58 year old."

"Oh sir! You read my mind!"

Telepathy. It's a useful skill as a schoolmaster.